Famous Atheist has Death Bed Conversion
For immediate release: Deadly Bread
(ACPA-London) Atheist Donald Chapman, famous for having seen an image of the Big Bang in a slice of toast, has had a remarkable death bed conversion. "It was truly beautiful to be there when it happened, " said Doctor Stephen Morton a specialist at Huddlesfield Hospice where Chapman is terminally ill. Local Vicar Arthur Pruett conceded that "it was really quite unexpected " adding reluctantly, "yes, I suppose I can be considered the cause of it all".
Chapman, from the North of England, became seriously ill after eating the famous Big Bang Toast. "I just got tired of the mayhem, people calling at my house day and night, so I ate it to make them go away", Chapman told the Huddlesfield Express. "Unfortunately too many people had handled it and within a few hours I was throwing up. A week later I'm at death's door, some sort of Botulism it seems".
The much talked about conversion took place over two days and started shortly after Vicar Pruett paid a courtesy visit to the famous atheist. "The poor Vicar they didn't have a decent place for him to sit" said Chapman, so I borrowed some tools from the maintenance staff and set to work".
The conversion, described as Georgian style with post modern touches to round off the Classical Edges, was completed with enthusiastic help from other patients and the night shift staff. It includes comfortable seating for 4 visitors, a built in 38 inch TV , small fridge, microwave and mini-bar. Two shelves filled with novels and an adjoining magazine rack complete the conversion and ensure all the amenities of home for patients and visitors alike.
While Staff and other patients raved about the changes, hospital administrators were not too pleased."Yes we regularly have death bed conversions in the hospice" said a clearly irritated administrator Phil Livingston, "but its usually subtle, maybe a plastic cup-holder or two, a mat for slippers, nothing like this".
Interior Design Magazine which broke the story wrote that "Chapman is clearly very contented since his project finished although I think he might be starting to annoy some of the other patients with constant talk about their need to convert too".
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